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the last sunset

mindfucked
Saturday, June 30, 2007

I'm a second, a moment, a lifetime too late. Maybe it was written, probably not for me. Maybe I expected, or maybe I was just too scared. The ecstatic whirlpool of everyday daydreaming kept me sane for weeks. Now, (when you're nowhere to be found) I long for that genuine smile when I see you, hear you, feel you.

I won't tell you, so I whisper it into the absent winds, I'm a disaster. Ah, yes. I remember. I'm afraid. I held back. And now, I'm a second, a moment, a step behind. A chance lost. A friendship saved (for the lack of a better word). If that's what people would call it. Was it even saved? Makes you think.

(Just for the record, you made me smile. I felt complete okay.)

So here I go with my plastic smile and my usual self. Denying, lying, pretentious.


People can be so goddamned gross sometimes.

smiled at the sun again @ 1:36 AM,




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